Saturday, August 13, 2011

Han

She's totally married.





Not the first person my age that I've known to get married, but the first I've been close to. Super close to.

Oh the story of Hannah.

This past week I've reflected on our relationship and how we came to best friends. I gave an outline of our meeting during my Love month challenge, but even as I read over that post I am at a loss to pinpoint the moment when we truly became best friends. Life is so utterly unpredictable that it could have been anyone, but at the same time, it couldn't have been anyone but Hannah.

Watching her come out of the temple with Tyler, she looked so happy, so beautiful, I couldn't help but feel a tiny stab of jealousy, I might not ever have Just Hannah again. Hannah has Tyler now, they come as a package from now on. But my pettiness faded almost as quickly as it came. He makes her so happy, and with him I've never seen her so at ease, so bright. It's true what they say, the person you marry only completes you. That's what Tyler is to Hannah, her other half.

After the group picture was taken, I scuttled away as quickly as I could, willing my quick feet to stop up my tears. I couldn't cry. Not there. It was a strange feeling I felt then. I've never been one to push back my emotions, especially tears. Normally I would greet them with open arms, comfort myself in the saline reaction of my inner workings. But for reasons that I cannot fathom, even now, I could not let myself cry.

The reception was beautiful. She fed him cake, threw her bouquet, and danced with her dad. The last few pictures of the night were taken; she would be leaving soon. I went in to hug her and I'd never felt so small. Hannah was so grown up now, so mature in a way she had always been, but now it was so obvious. And just as I wished internally that she hadn't outgrown me, she said, "Don't worry." And I knew what she meant.

I couldn't keep it in any longer. I cried and she watched me.

Hannah has always been there for me for me when I need her the most. And I couldn't have been happier than to have been there for her yesterday. I've never felt more honored than I did last night, standing in her wedding line with her family. Being introduced over and over as Hannah's best friend gave me a feeling I can't fully explain. If you know Hannah, you know how great she really is, how strong, and true, and trustworthy. She's the best friend anyone could ask for, but the fact that I'm her best friend makes me feel like crying. Knowing that I mean that much to her, out of all people, makes me feel like I matter.

Tyler is so lucky to have her.

1 comment:

Laura said...

Hannah was one of my best friends in grade school and she really is the best. I had lunch with her when she had just started dating Tyler and I could tell from the way she lit up talking about him that is was all over. They're both so lucky.