200th post here.
I have a vast number of thoughts floating.
Some are periwinkle, others orangey in hue, pulsing red thoughts, and murky blue ones, then there are those that are colorless.
It seems strange to me to have these multicolored thoughts in such an arrangement inside my head.
Usually, like-colored thoughts huddle together and shift to the front of my mind all at once, all together.
There is some kind of dischord, some dissonance of thought, occurring behind my eyes.
And I only wish I could see it.
They're whirling around in there, having a grand old time, not stopping at the front of my mind long enough for me to feel the truth of their color.
I get glimpses, glances, tastes, but the moment I make up my mind to determine which color it is, it's changed.
Not the same.
I can't know whether to be anxious or scared, slightly melancholy, wildly complacent, or joyously happy, confidant or defiant.
It would seem that I'm not meant to see the colors, and perhaps it's better that I can't.
Forced to rely on what I cannot see.
Somends are a mystery.